Ride For Life: Teaching others to open their eyes

VALLEY CENTER ---- Jordan Dennis huddled close to his father, patiently listening to the muffled sounds coming from Bob Dennis as he tried to communicate with his family. It took long moments and much repeating but Jordan Dennis finally understood what his father was saying.

"He said, 'This is my life's plan,' " Jordan Dennis, 27, told a listener. " 'I needed to slow down my life and this has forced me to. Now I think that my purpose was to help people open their eyes. I couldn't do this while managing my life.' "

Even though he has entered the final stage of amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, commonly referred to as "Lou Gehrig's disease" for the baseball great diagnosed with the illness in 1939, Dennis is still every bit the proud father.

Dennis is completely paralyzed with the exception of being able to nod his head. But one look at his eyes and it's obvious that a humorous man full of wit and wisdom still lives in his decaying body.

"When we die there is no judgment," Dennis said with the help of Jordan. "Our life is a temporary reality."

Dennis, 49, was diagnosed with ALS in 2002 and made the news in January when he participated in the San Diego Marathon in Carlsbad, to raise money for the Greater San Diego chapter of the ALS Association.

He described the experience last week with the help of his $8,000 augmentative speech device ---- a laptop computer he controls through a sensor in his reading glasses. By turning his head to point the glasses toward letters and phrases displayed on the screen, Dennis can operate the computer's audio program.

The equipment essentially gives the immobilized man a voice and Dennis uses it to describe what it was like to have friends, family and supporters push him for 26 miles in his wheelchair.

"The San Diego Marathon was a lot of fun," he said. "Many people who signed up (to push me) were family who had a loved ones with ALS."

The computerize speech device is also allowing Dennis to dictate papers ---- transcribed by his family ---- on three subjects: his life, his illness and Christianity, which allows him to "be at peace spiritually" with his situation.

Dennis was working as a fleet sales manager in Los Angeles when he was diagnosed with the disease that attacks nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord. ALS victims eventually die when the motor neurons, which send messages from the brain to the muscles in the body, degenerate. Once the neurons die, voluntary muscle action is affected and patients become paralyzed while remaining mentally cognizant. Patients tend to die from respiratory failure.

Most develop the disease between ages 40 and 70 and there is no known cure.

Dennis has lived with his mother, Jeanette Nelson, in Valley Center since April 2003.

She manages her son's feeding, bathing, sleeping and, of course, all his social activities. She has ensured Dennis has all the equipment he needs, including the recent addition of a device that controls his breathing while he sleeps. Once a month, Nelson organizes a pool party for friends and family.

She says that caring for her son, and honestly talking together about his death, helps her to accept the future.

"If he wasn't here with me," she said, "if I didn't have the honor and privilege of taking care of him, I don't think I could handle it or accept it."

Jordan Dennis, who is stationed at Edwards Air Force Base near Lancaster, visits every Wednesday, often bringing his two daughters, Norah, 2, and Abigayle, 6.

He says his father's illness has made him more political, vehemently supporting Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry because Kerry advocates stem cell research. He believes that is the key to finding a cure for ALS.

With each visit, Jordan Dennis says he learns from his dad.

"My dad inspires me," he said. "When I have a hard day at work on the base and I come home and my 6-year-old is in trouble I sometimes think, life is horrible. But then I think about my dad (and) ... My day doesn't seem that bad."

And that may be what Bob Dennis intends, when he says his purpose now is to open people's eyes.

He also offers a piece of advice.

"Relax about life," he says without the help of his son or his speech device.

The message comes through, loud and clear.

For information on the Greater San Diego chapter of the ALS Association, call (858) 271-5547 or visit www.alsasd.org.